Nothing better to do - take 2

Wanna get some yoga? Wanna get creative? Wanna do something nice?

So check out my new blog, www.thecreativesadhana.com, and join me :)

Wisdom

Prompt of the day: wisdom - What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?

Let me pause and reflect... This year I have been doing a lot of things, according to my own standards. The key word here is "doing". Because it all boils down to one thing: this year, I have decided that it was time to stop thinking and start doing.

Which is why you have seen on the blog a wide variety of activities such as:
- taking a course - evening classes -  in business management. I guess deep down I've always known I was not made to sit at a desk all day every day, working for someone else, and I've been preparing... My fear has been keeping me chained to this desk, but its voice has been slowly fading...
- travelling to Japan and Canada after years of dreaming about it;
- signing up for yoga teacher trainings and not chicken out;
- actually agreeing to teaching a one-on-one and not chicken out;
- writing - a lot;
- attending the European Summit for Global Transformation in Amsterdam and launching a second blog right away;
- new: applying for a freelance translator job with a translating agency - ok that was yesterday, so maybe it will work out, maybe it won't, but at least I've tried.

Now let's see how all this will play out in 2011!

For those of you stumbling upon this, playing catch up, and not knowing what I'm talking about, check this out, you might even want to join :) :

http://www.reverb10.com

HTML linking has been playing weird lately on this little blog, can't seem to be able to link directly, but that's better than nowt :)

Party

Prompt of the day : Party - What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans.

Do satsangs qualify as yoga parties?



Yeah, thought so too.



Then I've been partying all year long.

Source

Make

Prompt of the day: Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?

Oh I make a lot of things. For instance I am a skilled builder. I build great mind constructions.
For the foundations I use mainly Whatifs and Maybes materials, but I'm trying to switch to something else, as I found out these are porous and tend to crumble in the rain.
There's some new material available, I'm trying to get my head around using it, it's called "Letseffingdoit", heard great things about it but I'm a bit nervous. Anyone there that could give me some feedback?

I am the Queen of the land of Mindsandcastles.

Serendipity: next YTT weekend is end of January. Meanwhile we have to do a 30-day Sadhana project, meaning practicing anything for 30 consecutive days, and journal about it. I see creative journaling in the near future, sounds like fun :)

Moment

Prompt of the day : "Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors)".

I've been staring at this prompt for an hour. My mind went blank when I first read it. I'm going back and forth with this one, so I'd better start typing and see what comes out of it.

I could write about this yoga weekend, the one that changed my life, like an earthquake in my foundations, where I broke down in savasana.

I could write about going back to school for evening classes, feeling and feeding my brain, graduating.

I could write about travelling to Japan with Lovely Boyfriend, making a lifelong dream come true.

Or the moment I started my yoga teacher training.


But truly, now is when I feel more alive. I'm sitting at my desk, struggling with my work, searching for any and every excuse not to do it, instead searching the net to check if it would be possible to work as a freelance admin consultant / translator - proofreader / yoga teacher (yes, all in one - and that's only a brief summary - office yoga classes for the well being of employees, oh yeah!), wearing countless layers in this freezing office, and I can hear my soul screaming. I hear it telling me it's alive and that we need to get out.

My soul is still here, it's alive, I'm alive.

Now I need to give me that slap in the face and that kick in the ass ;)

Reverb10 : reflect and manifest

I must be crazy. That's it. I've gone complètement folle (ooooh, helloooo French, long time no see!).

As if I didn't have enough on my plate. And yet, I've added something. Something I first heard of about two weeks ago, something that appealed to me but I feared I would not keep up.

And yet... See that new lovely button on the right? Yes, the one tagged "Reverb 10". I gave in, I signed up for #reverb10, launched by the amazing Gwen Bell. For one month, starting tomorrow, I will reflect on the year 2010 and manifest what's next.
I know why I finally signed up: because I need it.

This year has been fabulous, this year change has begun, in waves and with an impact I can't even assess myself at this stage. As you all know I've been struggling a lot in my "day job". Calling it my "day job" is not a good sign in and of itself, is it? So I hope that next year, change will manifest in the form of a way out of this situation, and a way in to freedom and to the life I KNOW I'm worth living (I'm not saying "I deserve", that would mean we have to work to deserve a worthy life, while we're all already gods and goddesses, our worth is innate. Oops, sorry, I digress).

Aaaaanyway, I need the writing, in English, and why not take this opportunity to reconnect with my mother tongue (even if only I understand)? Every day of December, daily creative prompts will be sent, and every day, every participant will respond, in form of blog posts, via Twitter of Facebook, or simply journaling, whatever suits your fancy.

I won't share on the blog every day, I'll be away for a week end of December (family time!), but I WILL do something every day. Along with the 30-day sadhana project for my YTT. Yeah I'm a goddess AND a warrior.

I can't wait.

Interested? Check out the reverb10 website, and sign up too! :)

Do you remember the first time?

Do you remember the first yoga class you took?

I kind of don't, actually. I mean, I can't remember what we did exactly. I don't remember thinking that it felt like coming home, it felt more like "what the hell have I got myself into?!".
It was hard, my whole body was tight and not flexible at all, I couldn't follow the sun salutations despite all the pre warm-ups and all that leg stretching, that "your-body-should-look-like-an-inverted V" asathingy was bloody hard, I mean how is that supposed to look like a dog stretching?

I remember missing the second class I was supposed to take, thanks to starting a brand new job on the other side of town (yes the one I still have today) and not knowing how easy it was to walk back home (yoga was literally 5 minutes away from home) when there was a public transportation strike.

I remember going the week after though, because then I remembered how I had felt AFTER that first class. Yes it was hard, and I was never going to put my foot behind my head, but I felt good. I could live with that.

Do you remember the first class you taught, one-on-one or group class?

I remember. Mind you, I would be worried if I didn't, as it happened yesterday.
I remember being more excited than scared the days before, then slightly nervous 5 minutes before. And then really good :)
So I thank my first official student for trusting me and letting me guide her, and for showing me I could do this.

Wanna know the best part for me? In savasana I covered her with a blanket. She said afterwards that she loved it, because since her husband left her with their 2 daughters almost 2 years ago, nobody had done that for her. Such a simple thing.
I guess that was as much yoga as giving her hands-on assists in that "your-body-should-look-like-an-inverted V" asathingy.

Yesterday I learned as much as I taught :)

Yoga 101 - Kleshas illustrated

Hello dear readers, today we are going to review the kleshas with a couple of real-life examples directly based on my own experience.
For non-yogis / -yoginis, the kleshas are afflictions of the mind, they cause an agitated mind and in yoga, quiet mind = good, agitated mind = bad.
But let's take a closer look, shall we?

The 5 kleshas

• The first klesha is avidya, or ignorance. Example: "oh, I didn't know I could do that. Well for someone that takes pride in knowing herself, that's not very good is it? Hold on a sec... I know myself from 15 years ago, isn't it time to move on and check out who is "myself" today? And let go of the perception that others have of me? Yes, let's do that".

• The second klesha is asmita, or ego, as in "I am". Example: "I can't get into pincha mayurasana, I am not good enough (to be training as a yoga teacher, to be on this course, etc etc)". (Beating yourself up then because you think you're not good enough, thus making things worse, is a nice one too: "I shouldn't think that I'm not good enough, therefore I'm not good enough")

• I'll take a detour before getting to the third one by illustrating the fourth one (you'll see my point), dvesha, or aversion. Example: "that girl is STEPPING ON MY MAT, I mean, excuse me?!?! Argh, I HATE that!"

• And so here is the third one, raga, or attachment. Example: "Bloody hell this mat is my private space, my sacred space, MY PRECIOUS *gollum cough gollum*". (see why the third before the fourth now?)

• The fifth and last one is abhinivesha, or fear. Example: "Holy Shiva, this taxi driver is driving way too fast, he's going to KILL ME! Oh dear that was close. Ok breathe, this is your fear of dying manifesting here, and typically you can't control the way you're going to die, so if that's your way to go then so be it. Ahh, feels better now. And if we make it home, I'll tip him for making me reflect on abhinivesha and breaking a record, Brussels station to home in less than 10 minutes is quite impressive, even on a late Sunday evening". I think I got that one covered (and that's how you can tell I spent a weekend totally immersed in yoga, I guess my thinking otherwise would have stopped at "KILL ME!").

Disclaimer: I didn't use the proper Sanskrit spelling, but my computer doesn't want to cooperate with me and put the dots and accents where they should be. 

I'm curious peeps, what is your take on kleshas? :)

Edited to add: for those of you who are wondering "OMG did she tip the taxi driver? What a cliffhanger, I'm biting my nails now!" - well obviously I made it in one piece, and the experience's given me writing material. I guess I should've given him more...

A Friday before Yoga Teacher Training in the life of...

Today I'm going to London again ("yes we knoooow, stop it already!") for yet another YTT weekend. You have no idea how much I need this. Truth be told, I may have no idea myself how much I need this!

The last YTT weekend was 5 weeks ago. Only 5 weeks, and yet it feels like it was in another life. So much has happened between then and now, I even don't see everything clearly yet. A trip to Amsterdam for a life-changing weekend, a trip to Canada, more yoga off the mat clearly, and a whirlwind of things-to-do-I-can't-just-sit-here-and-wait.

I have seen, heard, felt a lot of things. My perceptions have changed, or have evolved more like. I have chosen to have a closer look at the world we're living in. I have dug stuff from inside of me that I thought were no longer there, I've been experimenting, I've been learning, I have opened up. A whole lot.

Now I have to pause and reflect, carefully considering what is important. To me.

So yeah, I need a weekend full of yoga, it will be like a retreat, except yoga-study-bootcamp style. I need the satsang, I need the community, I need the focus. But you know what? I also need time on my own, with nothing else to do than watch X-Factor munching on dried mango (is X-Factor still on by the way? Oh well...). My London hotel room is my take of a cave in India. Honest. Except way more expensive. And there's song-butchering involved.

I feel somehow that everything will make more sense, everything will tie in together, everything will fall into place. Or maybe not. Que sera, sera :)



(What a year it's been, franky I can't wait to read my end-of-year recap post :D)

Have a great wonderful enlightening joyful weekend!

Music Wednesday - have a guess

This should let you know where I'm going this weekend (that changes from yelling it over the rooftops don't you think?)

Enjoy the lightness!


"London, London" video by Cibelle feat. Devendra Banhart

(Devendra: you can totally call me. I have tons of chocolate ya know. Tx)

A weekend in the life of...

Oh dear, Sunday afternoon already, where does the time go? Ah yes I know, here is how it goes:

Saturday:
7:28am: wha..? Oh no, gonna sleep some more, mmmmllllffrrr tired.
9:51am: WHAT? Oh dear, time to get up! The famous duo "Bladder & Belly" are singing again... Kriya time, then breakfast.
10:30am: man, I was hungry. Time to shower.
11:15am: whoa, I took my time! What, Lovely Boyfriend is still in his pyjamas? Ok, let's do something useful and get these summer clothes down to the basement and move up the winter coats *cry*, oh while I'm at it summer shoes down (see you next year, lovely sandals), and what a mess in this cupboard, maybe I should declutter a bit in here...
12:30pm: guess it's time to go food shopping, our fridge is empty.
2pm: time for some lunch don't you think?
Pm: read "Heart of Yoga" for YTT, getting inspired, jotting down some notes, oh it looks my book report is almost done here and only needs typing, blogging on Change U Wish, reminds me I have to translate into French one of my posts there for a friend who doesn't understand English, then Twitter, Facebook, yadda yadda yadda...
6:15pm: crap, I was supposed to go running!
6:37pm: off running, 5 minutes walk, 30 minutes run, 5 minutes walk.
7:18pm: aaaaaaaaah, I'm soaking wet because of the pouring rain, but whoa I feel GREAT! Let's stretch a bit (yoga!) and quick shower, then back in my pyjamas and back to the couch.
8pm: Lovely Boyfriend: "eat?". Me: "Yeaaaaaaaaah!" (meaning I'm preparing dinner).
8:30pm: let's watch a movie while eating dinner, why not "Twilight" that we, err, borrowed from the net. Didn't want to go the theatre for this but we're curious.
9:00pm: if I was 15, I would totally drool over this Edward Cullen character. But I'm not 15, so let's behave (and Lovely Boyfriend's sitting right next to me).
9:30pm: WILL THESE 2 KISS ALREADY!?!
10:30pm: a last surf on the net, and I'm off to bed.
1am Sunday: WTF?!!

Sunday:
8:58am: decent time to get up, to "Bladder & Belly"'s last song. Kriya time, breakfast.
9:30am: I know I say that every morning, but man, I was hungry. Time to clean the apartment, yes in pyjamas, don't care, dirty laundry's waiting for them to join the club.
11:02am: we're done. On to some yoga, but first this paperwork stuff that's been bothering me. My fault, I'm late.
11:15am: I should really organize all these papers, sorting them out is a pain in the a**.
11:30am: "return this form electronically", okaaaaay, but where, how, how do I do this?
11:45am: *crying* it's not workiiiiiiiiiiing, the bloody site won't accept my passwooooooord, I'm gonna get fiiiiiiiiiined, I don't understand anythiiiiiiiiiiiing, I want to diiiiiiiiiiiiiie! Oh wait, what does it say here?
12:00pm: maybe I panicked a bit too soon. Maybe. It was easy after all.
12:30pm: yogaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
2:02pm: showeeeeeeer!
2:30pm: eeeeeeaaaaaaaaaat! (yeah Sundays have their own rhythm, we have a different perception of time). Oh yeah, "Life" is on TV, nice. Lovely Boyfriend wants to make the most of the sunny weather to take some photographs, see you later!
3:15pm: let's finish "Heart of Yoga". Watching "Trauma" at the same time might not be a good idea. Oh, it's raining now, Lovely Boyfriend must be loving this. I'm not grinning at all thinking about him outside.
3:45pm: yeah, "Heart of Yoga" finished, hello Wet Lovely Boyfriend! Time to blog a little, let's do something fun. Oh, I'll tell them about the first weekend at home in almost a month, might not be really interesting but I'm doing what I want on my blog, so there.

....

Yeah, that's pretty much where the time goes :)

Hope you're having a nice weekend!

YTT - weekend 1

Yes, I'm back. I got back on Sunday, but work, life, and feelings all over the place got in the way of my blogging.

What can I say really, what can I tell you that you yoga teachers don't already know?

I won't bore you with a hour-by-hour recap and all the details, most of you have already been there, but allow me to say that it was intense. As in, "it's 7pm I'm in London I could go out but I just want to veg around in my hotel room" intense.

The feelings of anxiety and inadequacy, sort of, disappeared as soon as I got to the studio where the training is taking place. Maybe because of something my teacher said: "you are where you are because where you are is where you should be". It always has more impact when someone else said it, right?

My fellow teacher trainees and I practiced, discussed, listened, absorbed, and left overwhelmed but wanting more at the same time.
Overwhelmed because there is so much to learn, so much to integrate in a class and make it work, and so much to do (homework, anyone?). Rachel is spot on in her latest post! But wanting more, more practice, more knowledge, more of everything.
Ever since I've been back, I want more of this. If truth be told, I feel that yoga is my real job, and my day job is just a supporting activity, I'm drifting away from what was once my whole life.  And it is scary and exciting at the same time.

My feelings are still all over the place as everything we did is still sinking in, so I'll keep this post short. Plus, I have to sort out my papers and notes, and squeeze in some reading before I go to bed. Current reading: Hatha Yoga Pradipika (translation of Bihar School of Yoga). Rock on!

PS: on top of that, full moon tonight. After dropping (and breaking) a small jar of china gel stuff, having on curtain fall on my face, and pouring a cup of tea not quite in the cup but more like right next to it, I'm afraid I might drop my laptop or delete the whole post by mistake. Better stop here out of safety reasons.